Is Being Gay A Choice?

[GBBob]

Originally Posted by Nascar1966

It all boils down to treating a person with dignity and respect no matter what thier orientation is as long as they also treat you with dignity and respect. I have no problems with a person who is a lesbian or gay. Ive met people like that before. Dont push it on me and we will get along just fine.

That is is a great post..But do you think they should have equal rights and benefits as married couples do?

[brianwspencer]

Originally Posted by GBBob

That is is a great post..But do you think they should have equal rights and benefits as married couples do?

And the problem is that, and I'm speaking from great experience here, but very general experience, that "don't push it on me," means don't hold hands in public, don't kiss your partner on the cheek, don't give me ANY idea at all that you're gay and we'll be great friends!

That's not exactly a welcome mat for gay folks...though lots of conservative heteros like to think it is, until you really flesh out what "don't push it on me," means to them -- nine times out of ten, it's 'please don't make me feel uncomfortable and even realize you're gay....if i have no clue at any point that you're gay, then I support you...otherwise you're pushing it in my face.'

It's a pretty important point to make.

[Danzig]

Originally Posted by brianwspencer

And the problem is that, and I'm speaking from great experience here, but very general experience, that "don't push it on me," means don't hold hands in public, don't kiss your partner on the cheek, don't give me ANY idea at all that you're gay and we'll be great friends!

That's not exactly a welcome mat for gay folks...though lots of conservative heteros like to think it is, until you really flesh out what "don't push it on me," means to them -- nine times out of ten, it's 'please don't make me feel uncomfortable and even realize you're gay....if i have no clue at any point that you're gay, then I support you...otherwise you're pushing it in my face.'

It's a pretty important point to make.

that's what gets me, when folks say that. exactly what does that mean? how does one push ones sexual orientation? if i tell a gay person that i'm married, am i pushing my straightness on them? maybe it's similar to someone explaining they aren't racist and mentioning they have a black friend.? my mother in law has a black friend, she's still racist through and through. yet she mentions she has one as a way of saying, no, when i say n_____ i'm not really being racist.

[Danzig]

Originally Posted by GBBob

That is is a great post..But do you think they should have equal rights and benefits as married couples do?

i know you asked nascar, but i'll answer. emphatically, yes! it's odd-we proclaim ourselves as the land of the free, yet other countries are ahead of us in this regard. whether states wish to recognize is one thing, i think the feds need to lead the way here. after all, it's our constitution that says all are created equal...now, arkansas' state constitution on the other hand......ugh.

[AeWingnut]

Polygamist

[hi_im_god]

It all boils down to treating a person with dignity and respect no matter what thier filthy deviation is as long as they also treat you with dignity and respect. I have no problems with a person who is a pervert. Ive met people like that before. Dont push it on me and we will get along just fine.

this just seems more honest.

[Antitrust32]

Originally Posted by hi_im_god

It all boils down to treating a person with dignity and respect no matter what thier filthy deviation is as long as they also treat you with dignity and respect. I have no problems with a person who is a pervert. Ive met people like that before. Dont push it on me and we will get along just fine.

this just seems more honest.

thats just not fair.

[ateamstupid]

I always love the "I'm fine with it, but just don't push it on me" qualified acceptance sentiment.

Chances are if chicks aren't beating your door down, gay guys think you're ugly too.

And what do you care if a gay guy hits on you? Tell him you're not interested and walk away. How is that any different from a chick you think is ugly hitting on you?

[Antitrust32]

I honestly took Nascar's "dont push it on me" as basically "just dont hit on me" which is a perfectly fine response. If he meant it as "dont let me know or ever talk about your partner and I'm cool".. then thats one thing. If he doesnt want a man to hit on him, there really is no problem in that.

It would be nice to see Nascar clarify that statement, but he might be getting some unfair criticism.

[brianwspencer]

Originally Posted by Antitrust32

I honestly took Nascar's "dont push it on me" as basically "just dont hit on me" which is a perfectly fine response. If he meant it as "dont let me know or ever talk about your partner and I'm cool".. then thats one thing. If he doesnt want a man to hit on him, there really is no problem in that.

It would be nice to see Nascar clarify that statement, but he might be getting some unfair criticism.

I was hoping he'd respond, too. The post I made after he wrote that was important because for LOTS of people "don't push it on me," means FAR less than "don't hit on me." Their idea of having sexuality "pushed" on them is any time they actually have to wind up being aware that gay people exist and live normal lives and have partners, etc. Non-excessive public affection (ie, a kiss on the cheek, holding hands, etc) is "pushing it on them."

Originally Posted by ateamstupid

Chances are if chicks aren't beating your door down, gay guys think you're ugly too.

LOL. Chances are that if chicks think you're ugly, gay men think you're even worse...and probably say lots of nastier stuff about you behind your back because of it.