Anybody hear any good jokes lately?

[timmgirvan]

Originally Posted by TheSpyder

One day an Irishman, who had been stranded on a deserted
> island for over 10
> years, saw a speck on the horizon.
> He thought to himself, "It's certainly not a
> ship"
>
> As the speck got closer and closer, he began to rule out
> even the
> possibilities of a small boat or a raft.
>
> Suddenly there strode from the surf a figure clad in a
> black wet suit.
> Putting aside the scuba tanks and mask and zipping down the
> top of the wet
> suit stood a drop-dead gorgeous blonde!
>
> She walked up to the stunned Irishman and said to him,
> "Tell me, how long
> has it been since you've had a good cigar?"
>
> "Ten years," replied the amazed Irishman.
>
> With that, she reached over and unzipped a waterproof
> pocket on the left
> sleeve of her wet suit and pulled out a fresh package of
> cigars and a
> lighter.
>
> He took a cigar, slowly lit it, and took a long drag.
> "Faith and begorrah,"
> said the castaway, "that is so good! I'd almost
> forgotten how great a smoke
> can be!"
>
> "And how long has it been since you've had a drop
> of good Bushmill's Irish
> Whiskey?" asked the blonde.
>
> Trembling, the castaway replied, "Ten years."
>
> Hearing that, the blonde reached over to her right sleeve,
> unzipped a pocket
> there and removed a flask and handed it to him.
>
> He opened the flask and took a long drink. " 'Tis
> nectar of the gods!"
> shouted the Irishman. " 'Tis truly
> fantastic!!!"
>
> At this point the gorgeous blonde started to slowly unzip
> the long front of
> her wet suit, right down the middle. She looked at the
> trembling man and
> asked, "And how long has it been since you played
> around?"
>
> With tears in his eyes, the Irishman fell to his knees and
> sobbed, "Jesus,
> Mary and Joseph! Don't tell me that you've got golf
> clubs in there too!"

Classic!