here it goes...

[jcs11204]

Originally Posted by GBBob

and dude...I know I sound like the old man that I have become, but please becareful with that OTB stuff...their Mom is out drinking, you're at an OTB...that's not good

i dont want to sit here and make her look bad in any way, she works, 8-5 everyday, drinks maybe a few times a week, as for the otb, latley its the only time i dont think about her, and i dont feel bad for not seeing my kids.

[3kings]

Originally Posted by jcs11204

i dont want to sit here and make her look bad in any way, she works, 8-5 everyday, drinks maybe a few times a week, as for the otb, latley its the only time i dont think about her, and i dont feel bad for not seeing my kids.

Ask her to see the kids more.........I don't want to sound as old as GBBob but gambling or drinking to compensate, for things not going well in life, is a very slippery slope

[jcs11204]

Originally Posted by 3kings

Ask her to see the kids more.........I don't want to sound as old as GBBob but gambling or drinking to compensate, for things not going well in life, is a very slippery slope

not to make excuses but i have always gambled... and i am not gambling more now, i just dont think about her when i do, like a outlet or something

[justindew]

1) Forget the gambling aspect of this. Just be responsible. As long as you are responsible, there is no need to complicate this by bringing gambling into it.

2) You can't do anything to make her want to come back. So don't try. The only thing you can do is push her away, which as sure as ****, you will do if you keep calling her. And NEVER question her actions, UNLESS it directly pertains to the kids. For instance, don't bring up the rap music thing.

3) Assume the relationship with her is over. In all likelihood, as soon as you move on, she will come back. But by then you won't care.

4) Dude, be prepared. It will likely get worse before it gets better. BUT IT WILL GET BETTER.

[jcs11204]

Originally Posted by justindew

1) Forget the gambling aspect of this. Just be responsible. As long as you are responsible, there is no need to complicate this by bringing gambling into it.

2) You can't do anything to make her want to come back. So don't try. The only thing you can do is push her away, which as sure as ****, you will do if you keep calling her. And NEVER question her actions, UNLESS it directly pertains to the kids. For instance, don't bring up the rap music thing.

3) Assume the relationship with her is over. In all likelihood, as soon as you move on, she will come back. But by then you won't care.

4) Dude, be prepared. It will likely get worse before it gets better. BUT IT WILL GET BETTER.

#3 is my biggest problem.... since we have been apart i have been with other girls, i have called some ppl from high school, and dated and ****...but i for some reasson cant assume its over, i want to, but i cant

[jcs11204]

Originally Posted by DaHoss9698

Attachment 801

you are the single reasson why i almost did not post this....
guess i was correct to think you could not keep out of it.

[Danzig]

since the two of you have chosen to bring two other people into the world, i'd think the #1 priority is (or should be) the two little innocents that will either have a decent upbringing or a childhood from hell-that's you and your ex-g/f's call.
i also think therapy would be called for here-family therapy for you and her, and for the kids as well when they get older. people tend to flippantly ignore what's going on in their lives when it comes to how the kids will handle it-they'll be fine is what you generally hear. not so. you two are the 'adults', if you're not acting as adults, kids only get more confused.
at any rate, kids are here, relationship is a bust. do what both of you can to raise the youngsters-she sounds responsible enough if she's holding a steady job, and it's good that her mom is in the picture. absolutely protect your rights as a dad, as you're protecting your kids' rights in the same way.
as for dating others, i'd pretty much avoid other relationships, as you certainly don't need more on your plate-nor do you need to add more kids to the mix.
just my .02 worth.

by the way, i should warn you-these are morty waters. and i think i hear jaws theme music playing in the background.

[jcs11204]

Originally Posted by Danzig

since the two of you have chosen to bring two other people into the world, i'd think the #1 priority is (or should be) the two little innocents that will either have a decent upbringing or a childhood from hell-that's you and your ex-g/f's call.
i also think therapy would be called for here-family therapy for you and her, and for the kids as well when they get older. people tend to flippantly ignore what's going on in their lives when it comes to how the kids will handle it-they'll be fine is what you generally hear. not so. you two are the 'adults', if you're not acting as adults, kids only get more confused.
at any rate, kids are here, relationship is a bust. do what both of you can to raise the youngsters-she sounds responsible enough if she's holding a steady job, and it's good that her mom is in the picture. absolutely protect your rights as a dad, as you're protecting your kids' rights in the same way.
as for dating others, i'd pretty much avoid other relationships, as you certainly don't need more on your plate-nor do you need to add more kids to the mix.
just my .02 worth.

by the way, i should warn you-these are morty waters. and i think i hear jaws theme music playing in the background.

thank you

[jcs11204]

Originally Posted by DaHoss9698

Attachment 798

yo for real your ****ed up... because when you pm'd me a while back i told you i was having problems with my fiance and thats why i did not post for about a month. so dont come on here and question me, when really you were the first one to know any of this, by about 6-8 weeks, i did not get into it with you , but i said im having big problems with my fiance.

[ArlJim78]

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[SentToStud]

Well, if you choose not to go the conventional route of seeking and heeding advice from a professional, a clergyman or various esteemed Derby Trail posters, you might want to read my latest book, Broads and Betting: When Babies and Booze Interfere.

You will find valuable insight which will probably lead to you learning:

1. You are probably happy with the situation or else you would be willing to try to change it. So, that's a plus.
2. It might help to take the kids to the track or OTB. I know it helped me.
3. It might be a good idea to stop making babies at this point. At least 'til you can determine, beyond a reasonable doubt, that the two you have can behave properly at the OTB.

[justindew]

Also, the sooner you accept that women are not normal people, the happier you will be.