This one paragraph salvaged the entire article:
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Speaking of Zenyatta, there can only be one. A New Zealand-bred 5-year-old mare named Zenyatta is not making her namesake proud. She has raced six times without winning. She has earned $834.
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Still trying to outsmart me, aren't you, mule-skinner? You want me to think that you don't want me to go down there, but the subtle truth is you really don't want me to go down there!
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