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Originally Posted by SentToStud
the 5 year old reference got me to thinking about a friend's 5 year old I watched for a morning.
I taught the kid to respond to being asked, "What do you have for Mommy?" by standing on his chair, grabbing his crotch and screaming, "THE BIG BANANA!!!"
Well, I took the kid to IHOP for breakfast and and I asked the waitress to ask the kid the question. Worked like a charm.
A few hours later, after suffering through a couple hours of unscripted kid screaming of THE BIG BANANA (you reap what you sow), the parents finally came to pick him up.
Of course, I asked the kid what if he had something for Mommy. The kid went into his full routine, cracking up my buddy and absolutely horrifying the kid's mother,
Funny, they never asked me to watch the kid again.
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My friend did the same kinda thing once. He watched a kid for a while and the mother was a real social snob. Every time a truck drove by the house, he taught the kid to yell "**** a truck!!!". Then he taught the kid to take a drink from a glass, smack his lips and go ahhh, then throw the glass on the floor.
Mother took the kid home and every time a truck passed them the kid yelled "**** a truck!!" at the top of his lungs. Then he got home and drank a glass of milk, smacked his lips and sighed, and threw the glass on the floor.
He never got asked to watch the kid again either.