I almost forgot the second part of the ad, the one geared toward the smart women out there:
"Hey, smart girl! Yes, you. Come on out to Pimlico and sit in a smelly smoke filled room where you can give the house 25% to help pay for the security guard to escort you out when you leave. On some days, maybe there might actually be another girl or two under the age of 70 that are here because they are smart and they like to solve puzzles. Why in God's name would you want to go to a bar or a mall or a restaurant or a show when you could be down here being eye groped?"
I apologize to all. The puzzle idea rocks!
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