[magic_idol]

Man naked, looks in the mirror and says to his wife "why do I always get a hard on when I look at myself?"
Wife says "Coz your cock thinks you’re a C**T too"


Why is there only one pall bearer at an aboriginal funeral?
Because there’s only one handle on a wheelie bin!


Talk about F***ing Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. I recently came back from a tour of duty in Afghanistan .
Having not seen my wife for months I was looking forward to a night of hot passionate sex.
Unfortunately she came out of the shower with a towel around her head so I shot her!


Two blokes talking. Do you look at your wife's face when you make love?
I did once and saw the anger in her face.
Why anger?
Because she was watching from the F***ing window.


Scientists found that many women develop " Hoover 's Disease" after a year of marriage.
They make a continuous F***ing whining noise and don't suck anymore.


Just watched "antiques road show".
This old lady placed a used tampon on the table and said "There you go you clever C**T, tell me what period that’s from"


Two Abos are in a bar talking. One says to the other "you ever notice after having sex with a white woman that your eyes burn, your nose runs and you get teary-eyed"?
The other Abos answered "yeah all the time"
The 1st Abos asks "why's that?"
The other replies "I reckon it's the capsicum spray"