so sorry for the loss of your friend lori. i know how you feel right now.
i lost one of my close friends to suicide over a year ago.
his was depression and a crystal meth addiction he couldn't kick.
he ended up thinking the new house he was moving into with his gf wasn't good. he kept saying to her he felt bad vibes about it but moved in . later she was freaking out cause he thought the house or something in it was out to get him. the meth was mentally taking him down. but nobody knew how bad he was on it as he hid it very well.
was a lead singer for a heavy rock band in minneapolis and had a amazing voice and always put up a front that everything was fine.
his mother called him the night before and he told her god is closer then you think. and all the years ive known dan ive never here him say something like that as he wasn't really religous per say.
the next day he ended up stabbing himself 9 times in the chest and stomach with a knife from the kitchen.
was a hon pallbearer at the funeral as he was cremated and it was tough. had to listen to the songs he wrote himself and sang on a tape at the funeral and him singing stairway to heaven all done in a studio. so many things run thru your mind in a time like that. and i'm sure they are with you also.
your right about it not being a cop out . it was just to much and as sad as it is your right . she is at peace now.
just go easy on yourself and take care
roger
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