Derby Trail Forums

Derby Trail Forums (http://www.derbytrail.com/forums/index.php)
-   The Steve Dellinger Discourse Den (http://www.derbytrail.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=4)
-   -   Florida politicians screw up, accidentally ban sex (http://www.derbytrail.com/forums/showthread.php?t=42261)

Riot 05-11-2011 09:16 PM

Florida politicians screw up, accidentally ban sex
 
God, thank you for changing the Republican party into the folks they are today: an endless source of entertainment pleasure

Quote:

There may be some terrible news to report out of Florida today, depending on how the state's residents have collectively decided to apply the basic science of biological classification to their lives. Last week, we noted some good news: The Florida legislature had finally passed a law that would outlaw bestiality and preserve the innocence of Florida's native fauna.

At the time, I posited that only shiny-pated grifter-Governor Rick Scott could possibly foul up the effort. But over at Southern Fried Science, blogger "Andrew" points out that the law's wording has basically outlawed sex entirely:

Quote:

An act relating to sexual activities involving animals; creating s. 828.126, F.S.; providing definitions; prohibiting knowing sexual conduct or sexual contact with an animal; prohibiting specified related activities; providing penalties; providing that the act does not apply to certain husbandry, conformation judging, and veterinary practices; providing an effective date.
Click here for a handy visual provided by Southern Fried Science that elucidates the fact that human beings are smack dab in the middle of the animal kingdom -- by which he means the "group of multicellular, eukaryotic organisms of the kingdom Animalia" and not the horse that won the 2011 Kentucky Derby (being "smack dab in the middle" of a thoroughbred horse is a situation the law originally intended to prevent).

Andrew ends with a quip:
Quote:

So if you’re living in Florida on October 1, 2011 and would like to have sexual intercourse with a consenting adult, please check with your veterinarian or local livestock breeder first to make sure you abide by "accepted animal husbandry practices, conformation judging practices, or accepted veterinary medical practices.”
(As it happens, I already check with my veterinarian and local livestock breeder prior to intercourse, but my therapist tells me that this is a "fetish" that he'd like me to consider discontinuing.)

The Twittersphere has reacted in exactly the way you might expect:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/0...=Fake_Gov_Rick

dellinger63 05-11-2011 09:44 PM

They'll straighten this out and let you have sex with the animal of your choice. Nice catch though!

Nascar1966 05-13-2011 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dellinger63 (Post 776047)
They'll straighten this out and let you have sex with the animal of your choice. Nice catch though!

LMAO

Nascar1966 05-13-2011 08:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Riot (Post 776043)
God, thank you for changing the Republican party into the folks they are today: an endless source of entertainment pleasure

The Dems entertain me with their talk about ethics. They have none.

Nascar1966 05-15-2011 01:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dellinger63 (Post 776047)
They'll straighten this out and let you have sex with the animal of your choice. Nice catch though!

Hopefully one of them is fixed. This world doesn't need another Riot.

jms62 05-15-2011 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nascar1966 (Post 776309)
The Dems entertain me with their talk about ethics. They have none.

Maybe if you gave a few examples instead of the stupid sound bytes people wouldn't think and treat you as a total fool. Must be tough to be treated as such.

Nascar1966 05-15-2011 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jms62 (Post 776563)
Maybe if you gave a few examples instead of the stupid sound bytes people wouldn't think and treat you as a total fool. Must be tough to be treated as such.

Must be tough on you to be cleaning toilets for a living. BTW don't you have a toilet to clean today? Don't you remember Pelosi's talk about the Dems having ethics? Obviously you for forgot that. Doesn't surprise me.


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 01:20 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.