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Cannon Shell 01-06-2008 04:22 PM

Interesting rant
 
January 5, 2008, 02:52 PM ET
Utterly F***ing Ridiculous.


by Gary Huckabay

The House Oversight Committee has summoned several players and former players, including Roger Clemens and Andy Pettitte, to testify before the committee.
All this time, I thought there was a writer’s strike. But surely, this has to be fiction, right? Pakistan is teetering on the brink of chaos. The economy’s fragile at best, plagued by fear, uncertainty, and doubt, both on the business and consumer side. Oil’s at $100 a barrel. We’ve got nearly 200,000 troops deployed and in harm’s way around the world. The federal debt is to the point where it’s about to grow by a digit — which would be its 14th.

So, facing these, and lots of other issues that face the citizenry, Henry Waxman and crew have decided to spend their time, their staff’s time, and, unfortunately, our time, by grilling a bunch of ballplayers about whether or not they used substances to enhance their play on the field.

Let’s stipulate to a couple things, just as part of a thought experiment. Let’s say that all the players are guilty. Of everything any has in the back of their mind. Dianabol Smoothies. HGH facial wraps. Testosterone-injecting parties that make the party scene in ‘JFK’ seem like a Sunday afternoon at Orrin Hatch’s house. Let’s go further. Let’s say that these ballplayers are making personal visits to high schools across the nation, speaking to classrooms every day with the central message of “Steroids worked for me! And now I’m a Hall of Fame ballplayer, rolling in cash, and tapping tail that would make Brad Pitt and Jay-Z genuflect before me.” At the end of each speech, players pass out samples of D-Bol and HGH, and some delicious fruit roll-ups, laced with ‘The Clear’.

That still wouldn’t warrant this kind of treatment. Waxman and his committee are displaying the basest kind of vile pandering, willing to do anything for a few minutes in front of a live camera with an opportunity to wag their atherosclerotically clubbed fingers in righteous anger. We’re talking about small widgets in a small business, that’s already done a hell of a job cleaning up their act, if you actually look at the numbers.

And before anyone gets the idea of writing me with yet another ironically juvenile “What about the children?!?!?!?” diatribe…piss off. The children are at far greater risk from the advertisement barrages that bracket innings within the game. No six year old should know who the hell Spuds MacKenzie or the Budweiser frogs are. Let’s tally up the damage to children from steroids compared to alcohol, shall we? Selective protection of the young teaches hypocrisy.

This whole issue is bulls–t, and everyone, in their heart of hearts, knows it. The collective societal masturbation on this issue is something out of Ionesco, and the number of whorish sell-outs who should resign in disgrace is climbing faster and more brazenly than Barry Bonds‘ HR totals ever did.

Don’t sit idly by and accept this miserable performance from Congress. Make a call. Drop an e-mail. Better yet, write a letter. Good Lord, if me or anyone else did their jobs in a similar fashion, we’d be justifiably terminated in nothing flat.

pgardn 01-06-2008 04:33 PM

Yes thanks for that Mr. Huckaby

Our entire State has to spend money
on testing because we got teenagers breaking
out with acne that look like pro wrestlers.

If Congress was supposed to work on one or two
items at one time it would probably be Iraq and our economy,
or health care. Unfortunately, a lot of things go
on at one time. Everynight on C-span you will see
committees discussing everything from decline in fisheries,
to need for infrastructure overhaul.

Where the hell has this guy been?
There is a committee to discuss the reduction
and inflation of committee's themselves. Maybe
he should get elected to clean things up.

ArlJim78 01-06-2008 04:54 PM

congress now is in charge of teens with acne?
i think we expect too much from the federal government.
what are parents and teachers for?

SentToStud 01-06-2008 05:23 PM

Waste of time and money. Bonds and Clemens have to defend against unsubstantiated testimony of felons.

It all bullshit.

Why don't they subpoena all the owners and GMs who knew this was going on and did all they could to support it?

Clemens should tell Congress to shove their invitation up their collective ass.

Cannon Shell 01-06-2008 05:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SentToStud
Waste of time and money. Bonds and Clemens have to defend against unsubstantiated testimony of felons.

It all bullshit.

Why don't they subpoena all the owners and GMs who knew this was going on and did all they could to support it?

Clemens should tell Congress to shove their invitation up their collective ass.

Why dont they subpoena half of Hollywood that has been busted for drugs or is in rehab for the 10th time?

pgardn 01-06-2008 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArlJim78
congress now is in charge of teens with acne?
i think we expect too much from the federal government.
what are parents and teachers for?

No our state run by a Republican governor is apparently
responsible. In Texas there will be random testing of
high school athletes in all sports next school year.
My daughter just misses peeing
into a cup... being that she is a senior,
not that she would actually miss the cup.

pgardn 01-06-2008 05:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArlJim78
congress now is in charge of teens with acne?
i think we expect too much from the federal government.
what are parents and teachers for?

And yes the FDA also has to approve acne drugs as some
of them are quite potent and have many side effects.

hi_im_god 01-06-2008 05:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SentToStud
Waste of time and money. Bonds and Clemens have to defend against unsubstantiated testimony of felons.

It all bullshit.

Why don't they subpoena all the owners and GMs who knew this was going on and did all they could to support it?

Clemens should tell Congress to shove their invitation up their collective ass.

"Clemens should tell Congress to shove their invitation up their collective ass."

i'll go out on a limb and say he probably will do exactly that in a sense.

most likely he files a civil suit against brian mcnamee so he can gracefully decline as it would prejudice his case. alternatly he takes the 5th.

Storm Cadet 01-06-2008 05:56 PM

They should go after Isiah and Dolan for ruining the NY Knicks :mad:

Coach Pants 01-06-2008 05:59 PM

Maybe that guy should cry harder?

Cannon Shell 01-06-2008 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Storm Cadet
They should go after Isiah and Dolan for ruining the NY Knicks :mad:

They should give Isiah PED's. His performance needs plenty of enhancing.

pgardn 01-06-2008 06:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cannon Shell
They should give Isiah PED's. His performance needs plenty of enhancing.

Apparently some white collar types did/do take Prozac for this.
Some speed. So when this commercial was put out I started
thinking about my sister-in-law trying to climb the ladder.
Rumor has it she tried the Prozac.

She is making a hell of a lot more money than I am.

If I tried this stuff I would spontaneously turn into
some type of neutron star. Hyper enough... and at
the same time incredibly unproductive according to
my spouse.

TheSpyder 01-06-2008 06:19 PM

Chuck,

Wanted to give you props for changing your avatar, even if it is racist.

I mean, back eye...come on....

Spyder

Cannon Shell 01-06-2008 07:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheSpyder
Chuck,

Wanted to give you props for changing your avatar, even if it is racist.

I mean, back eye...come on....

Spyder

OK we will get another one..:cool:

Danzig 01-06-2008 07:35 PM

glad to see congress is on top of things, that their priorities are in order and that they are taking care of the american people.

a war on two fronts, social security woes, fraud in medicare, a weak dollar....but that must all wait, as americas favorite past time is under attack!! go get em boys!

makes me sleep better at night, knowing our best and brightest are doing such great work with our money.

:rolleyes:

Coach Pants 01-06-2008 07:38 PM

Clemens looked like a liar on 60 minutes. Very defensive and kept looking to his left.

Coach Pants 01-06-2008 07:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Danzig
glad to see congress is on top of things, that their priorities are in order and that they are taking care of the american people.

a war on two fronts, social security woes, fraud in medicare, a weak dollar....but that must all wait, as americas favorite past time is under attack!! go get em boys!

makes me sleep better at night, knowing our best and brightest are doing such great work with our money.

:rolleyes:

Damn I didn't know the House Oversight Committee had so much responsibility. We're ****ed!!!

Danzig 01-06-2008 07:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pillow Pants
Clemens looked like a liar on 60 minutes. Very defensive and kept looking to his left.

before he even got started, when wallace was doing the intro, my husband said he looked like a liar....

then he opened his mouth, and he sounded like one too....

Danzig 01-06-2008 07:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pillow Pants
Damn I didn't know the House Oversight Committee had so much responsibility. We're ****ed!!!

i was including all those wastrels in my post.

it's just ridiculous, having hearings and such. let the sport handle it. it's just a freakin sport!

they don't have other things to overlook???:D

pgardn 01-06-2008 08:09 PM

Good to know most of the candidates on the political trail
are also spending all their time... ahhhh... trying to get elected?

All those dinners and raising money.
They could be spending time thinking
about... how the other candidates will
criticize them and then how to react properly.

Hell thats time well spent.

Shifty eyed Clemens is a bigfat liar.
We can call it off.

SCUDSBROTHER 01-06-2008 08:51 PM

The government(led by Bush and House Republicans) passed legislation against certain wagering on-line.There was no reason to do that.It's a free-market economy,and all that was is a free market at work.Instead of letting people in this country compete with businesses outside this country,they outlawed it.Now,the same people want to overlook what their favorite Conservative Texas Athletes did.The same athletes who I am sure are all for throwing the book at somebody caught with weed in Texas.I've noticed a huge change in people's attitudes about steroids and HGH since it was announced who did them.When it was Bonds and a few others,then they had one attitude,but when guys like the 2 TEXANS were announced to have done them,that's when ya hear all this "it's bullshit" stuff.So,why are they having these hearings? Well,if the guys were gunna be punished (like anybody else who breaks laws about drugs) then I don't think they would have the hearings.They are basically using this to punish them,because the rest of society seems to be willing to give these hypocrites a free pass.We have all seen this drug enforcement done based on who likes to abuse what drug.Since white Texas hero types got caught abusing these drugs,then we seem to want to practically make it for sale like nicorette gum.

TheSpyder 01-06-2008 09:06 PM

I'm addicted to nicoret gum and am about to loose my house.

HELP.

Spyder

PS: OJ was so innocent

hi_im_god 01-06-2008 09:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pillow Pants
Clemens looked like a liar on 60 minutes. Very defensive and kept looking to his left.

mike wallace looked like a meat bag that needs the air squeezed out. i think i saw the fishing line attached from his wrists to the puppet master.

very stiff and kept looking dead.

Cannon Shell 01-06-2008 09:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hi_im_god
mike wallace looked like a meat bag that needs the air squeezed out. i think i saw the fishing line attached from his wrists to the puppet master.

very stiff and kept looking dead.

He should hang out with Dick Clark more often. He died like 4 years ago yet they keep propping him up on New Years Eve like a "Weekend at Bernies" scene.

Scav 01-06-2008 09:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cannon Shell
He should hang out with Dick Clark more often. He died like 4 years ago yet they keep propping him up on New Years Eve like a "Weekend at Bernies" scene.

Weekend at Bernies?

hi_im_god 01-06-2008 09:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cannon Shell
He should hang out with Dick Clark more often. He died like 4 years ago yet they keep propping him up on New Years Eve like a "Weekend at Bernies" scene.

appy dew year!

ArlJim78 01-06-2008 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scav
Weekend at Bernies?

you're kidding, right?

ArlJim78 01-06-2008 09:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hi_im_god
mike wallace looked like a meat bag that needs the air squeezed out. i think i saw the fishing line attached from his wrists to the puppet master.

very stiff and kept looking dead.

there are animatronic figures in the Hall of Presidents at Disney World that look more lifelike than Mike Wallace.

GBBob 01-07-2008 11:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scav
Weekend at Bernies?

Please..no..I'm not that old

satan's twin 01-07-2008 02:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GBBob
Please..no..I'm not that old

Then again....did you notice how the fat kid in "Super Bad" looks like Scav's.

SentToStud 01-07-2008 04:38 PM

Clemens plays tape of Jan 4 phone call with this low-life McNamee.

People who are facing felony charges will say anything.

Who you going to believe?

Baseball spends $5-$10 million and Congree wants to spend who knows how much more.

Clemens should tell Congress to shove it where the sun don't shine.

People who are facing felony charges will say anything.

Scav 01-07-2008 04:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by satan's twin
Then again....did you notice how the fat kid in "Super Bad" looks like Scav's.

You calling me fat?

I consider myself curvy, especially in two places..

All kidding aside, I was trying to stir Chuck up on a Sunday night, I thought he would read it but I don't think he has, I think he signed out right after I posted it.

I HAVE seen Weekend at Bernie's

Coach Pants 01-07-2008 04:57 PM

Can you believe this guy? He was facing felony charges for buying and selling steroids and during this span of time he was also the trainer for Clemens and he expects us to believe that Clemens was on roids?

This is preposterous!!! It's bullshit! Attica! Attica!!


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